You might be wondering what the hell is going on… well let me tell you. On Wednesday morning my younger sister called me with some devastating news for my family. My parents have been a recourse family for three younger children for 15 months. During these 15 months the state has gone to court to try and terminate the mother’s rights. In November they had the last court date and the judge had 30 days to make a decision. 30 days had passed and she had not made one yet. Wednesday morning my mother got the call that she had made her decision. She (the judge) did not terminate the mothers rights and are letting the aunt take custody of them. Three kids who have become part of our family will soon be leaving my parents house. There is nothing my family can do and the state has decided not to appeal.
Wednesday was a very hard day for me. I feel apart at work. Luckily I work with a great team who took some time to pray for my family. But Wednesday night I kind of ignored it. I went on with my life like nothing happened. My attitude was wrong, but I didn’t and don’t know what to do? I don’t know who to mad at. I don’t know what to think. There’s nothing I can do, but how do I just sit back and let this happen.
I know that I don’t see the bigger picture, but I see the picture now. I see my parents who are so in love with three little children. I see three little children thriving. I see three little children who are in love with my parents. I see three little children who have come so far. And I don’t get how God could just take them away. I don’t get how taking them away could be better?
I’m tired God. I’m tired of this... A long battle fought and lost.
K'liyah, KeAwn, and K'Von this summer at Kings Island. (They had never seen anything like it...they were amazed)
To you three... You will be greatly missed. But know that you are loved by this family more than you know. I love you guys! You will always have a place in our hearts!
7 comments:
sending you a hug... and will hug you for real sometime soon. :)
Bubba,
Why did you chop off Dora's head? The kids saw this while they were surfing the Net and really freaked out cuz they actually thought Dora's head was GONE.
But....... sometimes it's so difficult to understand what God is doing, but let me tell you that He hasn't left you or me or the whole family. Why do I know this and have confidence in this statement? Because He has told us in His Word - "I will never leave you or forsake you". I know that there is a lot of scholarly ideas about what this statement really means, but God never intended for us to live off the scholary but off of the day-to-day life that the Word brings to us through the Holy Spirit. And today I take this statement to mean that in my grief and in my total misunderstanding that I can climb up in my Big Daddy's lap and rest my head against His shoulder and rest in His Peace cuz I know He's never going to leave me alone to work out my life - no matter what happens. That's kinda of what loving dads do for their children.
Bub
I don't get it either. We don't know what will happen. but we can still pray for a miracle. they aren't gone yet. let's fight for them, and whatever happens, we trust our heavenly dad.
You pray and listen, and just maybe God will give some ways to pray.
love ya
guess who
Well considering not many people call me Bubba...its really easy to figure that out.
I don't know how to be strong... i don't feel like a rock.
They've just become part of the family. They've become part of our lives and now I don't know what to think. I can't think about them without crying... I can't look at their picture without remembering everything they have brought to us.
Thanks! I love you!
Kalla this is a big loss no one expects you to be strong, you are allowed to grieve, to be angry, hurt, cry, have good days and bad days. These are all emotions of life. We are all here for you. If you need someone to sit and cry with you that's what we are here for. If you need to get away I'll drive. (mostly because your a scary driver) Allow yourself to live the emotions take them to God, Let him heal your wounds. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE STRONG just real. Who knows maybe God will use this to do amazing and wonderful things, even if that means healing their mom and family. I'm here if you need to talk, or yell or anything. Love you girl!!
That is so heart wrenching. Oh, the damage being done to these kids...
aha! no damage is being done!
the greens have taught them well, and the Lord said, "children do not soon forget!" remember Kalla, maybe they will be an impact on their family-you know how much has been downloaded to them from your mom and pops! how AWESOME would it be if K'von starts chatting about Jesus to Keisha. this kid is full of the Lord's love, he used to sit on my lap and point to the pictures while i read in children's, and tell me who was Jesus. and he particularly like the "i love you this much" book, because i think he got it the best. these little ones now KNOW the Lord, and they are strong! they will be strong! they will be superb! what glory of the Lord, and demonstration of your family's love and grace that they have taught them and prepared them int hese short 18 months...and i am certain, it was merely the begining of the lessons.
excited also for the way your family will heal together-
jillian
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