I have decided that I am going to elope.
My sister is getting married tomorrow and while I am very excited for her I have decided that I don't like big crowds so I am just going to elope. It's too crazy! Everyone wants to try and tell you what to do. They want to tell you that they know better than you. Just let the Bride do what she wants it's her wedding. Weddings are stressful. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
I can't believe that my sister is getting married. She is marrying a wonderful man who loves her so much. Want to be pursued by a man? Keith and Betsy have that story. For five years he pursued her... he asked her out she turned him down... he asked her out she turned him down... he asked her out she turned him down... he asked her out she turned him down... he asked her out she turned him down. He never gave up. I saw him hurt and sad and confused but now I see that spark in his eye when he looks at her. And it amazes me how much someone can get hurt from one person and yet love her so much. August 19th they will be one and I am so happy and excited for them. They are my hero's! To Betsy who I love more than I can ever express. You are my support in every single way... Lets go to the bathroom and to Keith- man you have always been there for me and I am so excited to actually be able to call you my brother. Thank you both for showing me how to love and never give up.
I am so glad that they have found each other....maybe I will post a picture tomorrow.
4 comments:
Good to see you last night! I hope you have a great time at the wedding!
That IS a beautiful story of pursuit that really touches a woman's heart. Despite the hassles of a wedding, that story certainly sounds worth celebrating with a great party! I wish them the best.
kalla,
Eloping ain't a bad idea. If I can offer my unsolicited two cents...
Weddings in Western culture are really really backwards. Don't get me wrong...I loved my wedding...it was absolutely perfect, and I can't imagine a more wonderful experience. But that doesn't change the fact that we do things backwards around here. Here's what I mean:
We celebrate weddings like they're 50th anniversaries. We surround the two people who, despite their incredible love for each other (and in your sister and Keith's case, incredible spiritual bond), really have no idea what they're getting into. I don't care how many great books you've read or how many pre-marital classes you go through...you're never ready to get married. Marriage is insane. It's wonderful, but insane. Starting on one single day, you choose the same financial partner, sexual partner, best friend, confidant, spiritual mentor and mentee, and closest confidant for the rest of your life, without ever trying any of these things out on that person before. (And that's the best case scenario). Now, it's God's powerful mystery that the whole thing works...and it does, and brilliantly...but you have to admit, it's freaking nuts.
So, we surround these two folks and cheer for them. Why throw them what will most likely be the biggest party they will ever have held in their honor, and we congratulate them on this insane decision. Then we eat cake and go home.
I think we SHOULD celebrate marriage. But, I think we should celebrate it differently. I think the engagement period should be a lot less about picking out napkins and invitations, and a lot more about putting both the man and woman to the test: ARE YOU CAPABLE OF BEING AN HONORABLE HUSBAND/WIFE? For the man, it means rigid tests of purity, priorities, leadership, servanthood, self-sacrifice and patience. For the woman, I imagine it means rigid tests of purity, servanthood, patience, persistent love, faithfulness, nurturing, self-awareness, self-sacrifice and humility. (I'm 99% sure I left a whole bunch of stuff out, but I'm trying to keep this rant as concise as possible :). Then, when the trials have been passed...then the celebration is a solemn and sacred one in which these two people vow in front of their friends, family and spiritual guides to uphold God's ideals for their marriage. Party? Maybe. Or maybe just the solemn ceremony. Remind them that what they did is not frivolity...they did not sign up for summer camp. They signed up for the most deep, difficult, powerful and incredible connection that intended between humans...one that is meant to directly model God's connection with us...and that their decision is a really big freaking deal.
Then...at the five-year anniversary, you throw a little party. Way to go...you guys stuck it out through the first five years.
Then...at the ten-year anniversary, you throw a bigger party. Way to go...you guys really stuck it out...ten years is a long time.
Then, at the twenty-five year anniversary, you throw a huge party...invite every important person in that couple's life. Holy ^&*(, you guys have done something AMAZING...you have stood by your word and chosen to love and serve each other for a quarter of a century.
Then, at the 50th anniversary...THEN, you invite the whole town...you invite the mayor, the bishop, and the governor. You throw the biggest damn party that your burg has ever seen. THIS is where you bring out the tuxes, the limos, the champagne, the DJ's, the cake, the linens, the flowers, the hand-printed invitations; the whole nine yards. You have done the unthinkable...in a world steeped in broken homes, you have held together, bonded to one another, and kept the covenant you made before God and man a lifetime ago. You are truly examples of God's enduring love and faithfulness. You are our heroes.
Sorry for the lengthy post...I get fired up about this one. Weddings are beautiful things...but I can't wait for our 50th anniversary.
Peace,
Justin
weddings haven't been my favorite thing lately. :) and i agree with justin to a certain extent. so often way too much time and money goes into a lot of the external stuff that happens at weddings without the proper preparation for truly becoming one with another person, without the friends and family taking seriously their roles as witnesses of the vows (the whole witnessing of the vows thing is one major reason why i wouldn't consider eloping, personally). all the same, weddings are definitely something to celebrate, especially when it's a story of two people who have been pursuing God's path for them individually and have suddenly found themselves walking down one path together. and in our commitment-phobic culture, i think couples who are willing to take that step can use all the encouragement and support they can get. i'm happy for keith and betsy... is our God incredible or what?!
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