Simply Stated

Regret

2010-05-10T14:40:00.002-04:00

The definition of regret

–verb (used with object)

1. to feel sorrow or remorse for (an act, fault, disappointment, etc.): He no sooner spoke than he regretted it.

2. to think of with a sense of loss: to regret one's vanished youth.

–noun

3. a sense of loss, disappointment, dissatisfaction, etc.

4. a feeling of sorrow or remorse for a fault, act, loss, disappointment, etc.

5. regrets, a polite, usually formal refusal of an invitation: I sent her my regrets.

6. a note expressing regret at one's inability to accept an invitation: I have had four acceptances and one regret.

Regret normally follows the thoughts of what did I do that, what am I so ashamed of, what are those things I wish I could take back, what do I wish no one new about me?

I have heard the term regret a lot lately and it got me thinking about what I regret. And I can’t come to think of anything. Now you might say, “Wait there is NOTHING in your life that you “regret”? And I would have to say no. Don’t get me wrong I have done stupid things a long with some stuff I am not happy about but I would never say that I regret those things. Those things that I have done (right or wrong) have made me who I am today. No I’m not proud of them but every situation taught me something different.

I’m not that type of person that can be told not to do something and I don’t do it. I am probably the complete opposite and would do it just to find out for my self. But that’s me (and my son… ugh!) and that’s they way I’ve been since I was wee little. And yes it did get me into trouble a lot and sometimes I learned from my mistakes and sometimes I just repeated them.

I tend to think people regret relationship decision the most. But I can’t say that either. I have to look at the good that it gave me rather than the hurt. Everything in our lives happens for a reason whether we are doing the right thing or not. And we might have consequences from our decision but those were the decision we made and those consequences shape who we are.

I am who I am today because of right and wrong I have done in my life. I am who I am today because of my mistakes and I am okay with saying that. But I also am who I am today because out of those mistakes I had consequences. I would not be who I am today if I regretted everything wrong I have done in my life. I’m sure if I regretted everything in my life I would just be the same old person.

So what do you regret (if anything)??

There Will Be A Day

2010-01-11T23:14:00.006-05:00

“There will be a day with no more tears and no more pain.” Jeremy Camp sings that in one of his songs called There Will Be A Day. I first heard this song about a month before my Mimi (grandma) passed away. She had recently gone in the hospital for a cough that was really fluid on her lungs. The only part that I acutally really heard of the song was “there will be a day with no more tears and no more pain.”

Mimi was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in 2008. Right away they did a full histarectomy and shorty after that she had several rounds of chemotheropy. During surgery they realized it was a lot worse than what they had imagined. But they couldn’t tell anyone if it had spread or not.

In June 2009 they found a spot on her lung. They immediately started chemo again. But this time was different. She didn’t come back as fast. She was more sick every day. She had a cough for a while before she did anything about it and when she did they found fluid on her lungs . She was then admitted to the hospital where they had to give her plasma (she had been on a blood thinner due to clots) to thicken up her blood so they could drain the fluid off her lungs. I wasn’t there that night but from what I hear it got pretty scary. She said that night that she didn’t want to die. She wanted to fight this. But it didn’t last long after that.

I tried to visit my Mimi as often as I often as I could. During the last month of her life I barely said a word to her but that didn’t matter to me. I slowly show my Mimi go down hill. A woman who was always full of spunk she laid in bed not eating or drinking much during that month. I also saw this just crumble my Papa (grandpa). He sat by her side every day in the quiet, dark room because the noise and lights bothered Mimi. Sure he got frustrated his wife of 40+ years was not the same person she was 2 years ago.

I will always remember the first times she got to hold my babies. The way her face would glow with excitment as she held her great grand children. She would touch every part of there face and tell them how beautiful they were. I even remember her telling Caidan how beautiful he was (even though he was a boy) and she always said. “You can still be beautiful and a boy!”

My Mimi was the best Grandma in the world. Now if you would have asked me when I was younger I probably would have said something different. But after getting to know her I knew she was a special person. Of course we all knew she had her opinions and sometimes she got a little fiesty but through everything I think I can say that she was one of the best wives, moms, Mimi, and great-Mimi's there were.

In September of 2010 she died from an infection and cancer. I didn’t realize how truly difficult for me it would be and to be quite honest I still can’t grasp it. I thought about taking something over to my grandpa the other day with the kids but then I thought what would Caidan think… would he ask about Mimi? And then what do I say? Personally I don’t have the strength to tell him yet… I’m sure he doesn’t remember her all that much but then again how do I know?

I know that I have been depressed over this since she died. I stopped doing things I loved… I hardly left the house some days. I miss not being able to pick up the phone to call her for one simple thing and be on the phone with her for hours! I miss the way she laughed all the time with my kids. I miss her advice on mothering. I miss everything about her!

It will be six months that she’s been gone at the end of the month and I can’t believe it one bit!

Mimi,

You are truly missed by many… and will always be. I hope life is great up there and I can’t wait for the day that we can all laugh together FOREVER! LOVE YOU!

Bankruptcy

2010-01-10T21:33:00.002-05:00

Bankruptcy can be a scary word for most people or a lot of people but for me I have learned to thank it. Last year was a rough year for us. It started off bad and it just continued to be bad. Though we found joy at times it was also a very unsure season for us.

We filed for bankruptcy last summer (2009). We knew that we had been struggling for a while paying bills and paying our mortgage. Every penny we had coming in was going out to pay for bills. We went to a debt counselor who only told us there was nothing they could do for us. Do you know how frustrating that is? To ask for help for something that is already embarrassing and then to be told “Sorry but there is nothing we can do to help you.” It was devastating. After meeting with the debt counselor we tried our hardest to do whatever we could but it looked like the bills and mortgage were getting the best of us.

With a lot of prayer and guidance from family and friends we made the decision to file for bankruptcy. Our thoughts at first were to file Chapter 13 (which is the pay back program) but after talking with the lawyers we decided that that was not an option for us.

Before meeting with the lawyer I had read as much as I could on bankruptcy just so I could better understand it. I had visited Dave Ramsey’s site and for him Bankruptcy was a horrible situation. And to be honest I was scared out of my mind. I didn’t know what to expect but I also knew living the way that we were living was not possible anymore. Not knowing if there was going to be money for food not knowing if the house payment was going to get paid or when all the bills were getting paid and if something had seriously gone wrong with either of us we didn’t have money put aside for it. We were living pay check to pay check.

What do we do about the house??? That was the big one. We had been struggling to pay our mortgage for over a year at that point. Since Chris bought the house brand new the taxes for the house and property were not figured out. So every year for the last 4 years our mortgage has gone up A LOT! We were aware that it was going to go up but the amount that it went up was way more than anyone could have thought. And there was no way we were going to be able to save it. We knew from then that we would lose the house.

Our bankruptcy was final in November and we haven’t even begun anything with the house yet. But where we are right now compared to last year is much better. Yes there are a lot of unknowns. We don’t know how much longer we have in the house. We aren’t really for sure on where we are going to live after here. But all we know is that we are doing the right thing for our family.

The reason the word “bankruptcy” doesn’t scare me and I thank it is because it has opened so many doors that I don’t know I would have seen if we were still where we were last year. Last year I was looking for a job nonstop to try to help support my family but at the same time I still had to think about my kids. Who would watch them when Chris wasn’t working? Would an employer be willing to work around Chris’ schedule so then we wouldn’t need a sitter? But nobody ever contacted me back. And in all honesty I was okay with that. I did not want someone else to take care of my kids. Yes that means a lot of sacrifice has to be made but we were also okay with that. We cut out all the unnecessary things which only really left us with the basics. You want to know a surprise- we survived. I have learned that shopping on a budget for us is very doable. I get groceries for $50 a week for us (right now that doesn’t include diapers or the kid’s milk-they drink soy milk and it’s about $20-$30 a week). I have started to make a lot of our foods or I should say trying. I love to cook/bake. It is so much fun for me. So making things from scratch is not only fun but cheaper and healthier.

I’m not a big goal person but I do know that in 2010 I want us to be more financially fit. And I am not really sure what that means but I am sure I will find out.

So here is a little piece of advice if you are struggling with your finances... get help right away. It’s okay to get help and its best to get help right away.

Too Long!

2009-07-08T16:43:00.004-04:00

Its been a long time...

Well not much as gone on... But at the same time a lot is going on. Right now our family is going through a lot (I should just say Chris and I because Caidan and Kloe have no idea). I'm not going to go into details because I simply don't think I can handle it much more. We are trying to make the best decisions for our family! But just keep praying for us.

Caidan will be 2 on the 18th and I can hardly believe it. I was looking at pictures from is 1st birthday and how little he looks and how big he is now. He is sweet and loud and stubborn and persistent he's a lot more but my point is HE'S GOING TO BE 2! There is no way that I would ever trade these two years in my whole entire life. He is defiantly going through the "terrible twos" (which to me doesn't even being to describe it). He loves Fire trucks to death! But he only calls them FIYA! Every once in a while we might get a FIYA TUCK but very very rarely. He doesn't talk that much really... which is okay with me because that just means I have a little bit more peace for just a little longer. I have a feeling that when he starts to "really" talk then Kloe will beginning to speak and then its all over. Its funny to see how much he has grown up.

Kloe well she's just Kloe. She has her own little mind. She wants what she wants when she wants it. She is totally a fit thrower. She already can throw a MAJOR tantrum (I know she's only 10 months see what I mean). Caidan needs to watch out for her because I believe that she is keeping tabs of all the times he has done something to her and when she can give it back to him she's going to lay it down! She is crawling (we should say army crawling) and sitting up. She is a teeny tiny little thing. At 9 months she weighed 16lbs. But I believe she is starting to gain more weight as she is eating a lot more and eating table food. SHE LOVES TO FEED HERSELF! and she always loves what I am eating of course. Sometimes I don't even know why i bother making them anything because they ALWAYS eat my food. She also says DADA! If you tell her to say MAMA she goes DADA! How come MAMA has done everything for her and all she wants to say is DADA! (now you know how I feel about that). She did give DADA a kiss the other day and it was the most precious thing ever! She doesn't really do it for me but of courseshe always does it for DADA!

Don't let that face fool you he is 100% ROTTEN!

That face can fool you though because she is so CUTE!

The weekend!

2009-05-04T20:48:00.004-04:00

Kloe and I were supposed to spend the weekend in Cincinnati but someone got sick and we didn't get the chance. Lucky for me though Sara is flying in tomorrow to spend 10 WHOLE days with ME and the kids... oh and Chris). But we had a good weekend as a family.

I went garage sale shopping with our neighbor and Chris went fishing and I got the house to myself for a couple hours I was cleaning but I still had no one else her and that was EXCITING!

Last week we built a flower box/garden thing.

We have all the stuff to start our garden too... that is the next thing to build. But we have to wait for the fence to go up.... that is also exciting. Oh I can't wait.

Here are some pics of the kiddos today!

Can you tell Caidan likes POP?
Yeah don't try to take it away from him because he throws a fit!
haha!

Here is Sissy girl her self... She is wonderful and beautiful all the same. I have to say that it has taken my time to enjoy her. It was a tough start and a lot all at one time but she is becoming a wonderful little girl. she is a mommies girl. She does not like anyone else to hold her except her mommy. She is finally starting to love her Daddy she melts when he walks in the room... even if he doesn't say anything to her her eyes get so big (not that they aren't already) and she lights up! Caidan and her have a bond that I will never understand and will most defiantly get them in trouble together. Even though some days can get tough she is the most precious thing ever.
I love her more than I could ever tell you.

2009-04-03T22:37:00.004-04:00

Here's some pics for everyone to enjoy. We kind of had a big week... caidan decided he was going to climb out of his crib... so to a BIG BOY bed we went... I will try to take a picture soon. (its a firetruck) Kloe is learning to sit up... oh she is growing up and I think i am ready for it... maybe!

Look at her she looks SO BIG but she is a peanut! hehe!

She loves her mommy... she always cries when she see me.

This is what happens when brother tries to feed her... he tries to feed her all the time and today he actually did. And then he gave her the rest of the jar... I bet you can tell what happened to it.

He's my little Man!

MY KIDDOS! Its not the best picture but it was the only "good" one I got! He doesn't like sharing the camera with his sister. She just as cute as you dude so you better get used to it.

Caidan and Bitty LOVE to take baths together... don't ask me why but when he is in she whines and YELPS and Caidan tries to grab her collar and pull her in (she's to fat to just jump in)

WE LOVE EACH OTHER!!!!!

Big Day Yesterday

2009-03-17T14:25:00.003-04:00

Yesterday was a big day for my little girl. She got her tubes put in her ears and she ROLLED OVER (both ways)! She is my trooper! The surgery was nothing it took about ten minutes and she was back. You wouldn't have even know all day that she had surgery. And she has been working on rolling over for it feels like months but probably more like weeks and yesterday she did it. Here are some pics....

She is precious!!!!!

This is what she does right before she rolls over...

And more getting ready!!!! :)

Oh and we can't forget this cute little boy!!!!

(I can't take credit for the picture that was Sara of course but I can take credit for the editing! :)

I wish

2009-03-09T12:00:00.002-04:00

I wish I could say that everything is great but I feel like its just far behind great. One week after seeing the ENT 4 days after seeing her Doctor Kloe has come down with yet another ear infection. We've been dealing with sleepless nights, constipation (with Kloe), ear infection, Caidan falling/ tripping and busting is eye open, and Chris has had a headache for going on 5 days now.

I have acall into the ENT today to schedule tubes for Kloe. Right now she is on antibiotics but I don't think they are making it better because she is getting worse.

The past couple nights she has been sleeping with us because its the only way she will sleep. I don't know if you have ever slept with a baby but you sleep but not really so lets just say I am running an empty these days.

Please continue to pray for all of us as we are all on edge. And for Kloe that this will all get resolved! Thanks everyone!

It's been long

2009-02-23T22:46:00.002-05:00

Well its been awhile... I feel like its only the beginning of the month and when I realize its almost the end I have no idea where the month has gone... oh yeah I know spending my time in and out of the doctors office. I have been to the doctors atleast 6 times this month and 3 times within the past week.

My babies are always sick. Kloe has had an ear infection that after three rounds of antibiotics hasn't gone away which mean the today and for the next three days I have to take her into get shots. Its very very sad. She doesn't sleep and when she does it is only a short period of time. Oh and when she is sleeping it isn't in her crib... she sleeps in the swing because that where she sleeps and if she sleeps at this point she can sleep where ever she wants.

Caidan has had 6 ear infections with in 6 months.

So our next step the ENT.

I AM DESPERATE!!!

2009-02-19T15:10:00.002-05:00

I don't know what to do anymore. Kloe has been sick for 4 weeks now (ear infections) she is now on her third medicine and she WON'T SLEEP! The only way she wants to sleep is attached to my boob. I am trying to get her back on a schedule but its a long process with her and I am exhausted and frustrated. She has been sleeping in her swing for 4 nights now and I am beginning to wonder if she will ever sleep in her crib again. I know it can't because her ears... because she has no problem sleeping on my bed.

HELP any would be greatly appreciated! I am on the verge of tears every time its nap time or bed time okay maybe I do cry a lot of the time.

I just want my daughter to SLEEP. When she is a wake she is so precious and great but getting her to sleep is just FRUSTRATING!

You have no idea!

2009-02-15T12:27:00.003-05:00

Seriously you have no idea how happy I am to post this...

BUT it will have to wait... I got to get my camera hooked up....

Stay TUNED!

A firemans wife

2009-02-10T21:24:00.003-05:00

I heard a saying the other day...

A fireman's wife is a single life.

How I don't want to believe that I feel it I do. I don't for one second think that my husband doesn't work hard but when all you do is sleep with your husband it feels like I don't even have a husband. Chris has been working a lot of over time in the past month which has made me CRAZY! But I am thankful that this week is almost over.

Here is a poem I found.

Fireman's Wife

The table is set, the meal's prepared,
our guests will soon arrive.
My husband once more disappears
with a hope of keeping a child alive.
While waiting at home again alone,
our plans having gone awry.
My first impulse is merely to sit down and cry.
But soon again I realize the importance of my life
when I agreed to take on the duties of being a fireman's wife.
While there are many drawbacks,
I'll take them in my stride
The gusting winds and raging flames
may be his final fate,
But with God's help I can remain
my fireman's faithful mate.

Mmmm...

2009-02-02T21:55:00.002-05:00

I think this is what my daughter thinks when she sees me. :)

We're all having a bad day... except the dogs

2009-02-02T17:30:00.002-05:00

Here's my day...

Brother is crying because he:
a) wants something he can't
b) gives the dogs his food
c) wants out of his nap which he didn't take
d) his gums hurt

Sissy is crying because she:
a) needs to sleep
b) needs to eat (which she has done about every hour)
c) because she gets left alone because mommy has to deal with brother
d) because she is teething

mommy is crying because:
a) she has to deal with these two by herself
b) she wants daddy home more
c) she needs more sleep
d) she just cant handle the crying anymore

Oh and the dogs well they just SLEEP all day... how i wish I was a dog at the moment.

Here are more....

2009-01-07T20:47:00.005-05:00

My sister takes the best photos in the world and i am so excited that she takes my kids photos and our Families!!

So if you are interested check her website out!

Here's a preview!!!

2009-01-03T18:49:00.003-05:00

I love my family!

Caida's new haircut

2008-12-17T19:00:00.002-05:00

2008-12-14T19:41:00.003-05:00

Here are some videos for my fans! :)

Here is Kloe laughing

Here is Caidan telling you what a penguin does and what santa says! :)

Over Thanksgiving

2008-12-03T08:22:00.000-05:00

Here is what we did on our Thanksgiving....

We visited my family! It was great!!!!
Oh and Sara took all the pictures... which I have like 500 of! Seriously... I think the real number is 429! :)

I don't know how to...?

2008-12-02T19:36:00.003-05:00

This little girl means the world to me... Okay so does this little boy.

Kloe is 3 months old... I can hardly believe it. I tell her everyday to stay little (i now know what you mean Angela about telling your girls to stay little). She has gone from being 7 lbs 9oz at birth (which to this day I am SHOCKED) which was 4 weeks early to being in the hospital for 8 days to having two ear infections within two months to now being almost 12lbs (which she is probably over) to starting to laugh and smiling.

But here is the problem... she is 3 months old and she still sleeps in my room. Which I am totally okay with but my husband is not. I however am not ready for her to sleep in her room. Caidan was 2 weeks when he started sleeping in his room and I can't seem to let go enough to let her sleep in her room. I still feel like she is so little. I have thought about bring her crib to my room but my DH says NO!

So my question is or questions are...
How long did your little one sleep in your room and how did you make the transition?

I just think this picture is pricless! I can never get the looking at the camera at the same time and Sara captured this picture perfectly! Thank you Sara...

Caidan can beg too!

2008-11-10T12:43:00.005-05:00

So while at the store the other day I picked up some Beggin Strips for the dogs. I had Caidan with me and since the package is like the package his cookies come in he thought they were cookies. He screamed forever in the store. I finally had to get him cookies just so he would stop.

Then when we got home I decided to give each of the dogs a strip. They loved it of course! Well then Caidan started screaming again thinking they were his cookies again. I was trying to tell him they aren't your cookies they are the dogs treats. But he wouldn't stop. He tried to get in the cabinet to get them out but couldn't because of the child locks which made him more frustrated. So I thought well if I give him a little taste he will realize that they aren't his cookies and stop... that however was not the case. He had a little piece and wanted MORE!! I didn't not give him more.

So now every time he sees the dog treats he thinks they're cookies!

I also started a new blog. www.SAHMsaving.blogspot.com

What would you want?

2008-11-06T22:43:00.003-05:00

I have a friend (our first borns are 5 days apart) who is having her second baby girl anyday now (I am so excited!) but I really want to do something special just for her. I thought about putting a Survival Kit together for her. But I am having a hard time coming up with things. All I can think of right now is... Coffee (decaf and regular), a coffee cup (even though she has a whole bunch maybe a extra large coffee cup?), breast pads... and I can't think of anything else. So thats where all you come in. I want to get a whole bunch of stuff so I am thinking of cheaper little things.

So my question to you is...
If you were expecting your second child or third or fourth or even your first, and someone was to give you a "survival kit" what would you want in it?

Thanks in advance for the help.

Our FUN filled weekend

2008-11-02T15:21:00.005-05:00

Our weekend started Friday morning. I was getting ready to go to my doctor appointments when Caidan (being the monkey that he is) decided he was going to climb on the bed (which is an every day occurrence) and tripped on the pillows and hit is lip on the head board and busted it open. I then had to take him to the Immediate Care (urgent care) where he got 1 stitch in his lip. Luckily my mom was here this weekend so she watch Kloe while I took Caidan.

Then came tricker treating that night... it was fun and Caidan was a monkey!!!

The Fall

2008-10-29T12:27:00.002-04:00

I am not really a fall girl but Cheryl (my mother in law) and I went to the park and took pictures of Caiadn in the leaves. He didn't really like them all that much!

Caidan being Caidan

2008-10-27T10:07:00.004-04:00

So this is a typical day when Caidan is just being Caidan.He loves to climb on EVERYTHING and ANYTHING! Here we found him in the dogs cage which was on top of another dogs cage. Don't ask me how he got up there because I don't know... but he is a monkey!

(None of this was stage is was all my brilliant son!)

Pumpkin Patch!

2008-10-24T16:33:00.003-04:00

Yesterday we went out in the windy cold air and got pumpkins and apples and apple cider doughnuts and apple cider (I love REAL apple cider! And unfortunately I paid full price for it... :( )

While we were waiting for the tractor Caidan went and played on the pretend tractor.

Caidan was concerned when the tractor started.

He wanted to pick up his own pumpkin since mommy and daddy were doing it!

He had a BLaST walking the pumpkin patch. His favorite part was at the end...

There was a golf cart! While we were searching for the perfect pumpkins he was making his way to the golf cart.

We left daddy out in the patch while he was still looking for his pumpkin to go back and get the wagon so we could haul them back.

My Sweet A$$ Deals

2008-10-15T15:33:00.006-04:00

I didn't blog about my deals last week but I did really well . I spent

a little more out of pocket (OOP) than I wanted to but in the end I made a profit! :)

I got this at Walmart for a dollar!!!

This however I didn't make a profit on but couldn't pass up these deals.

We have a Goodwill that opened in July or August. When I went in last week I found a outside climbing toy for 9.99 and a Britax Boulevard car seat for 39.99. At first I was a little worried about the car seat. But it was manufactured in JAN08 and it was still in the box and in the plastic. So I couldn't pass up the deal.

This week so far has been really GREAT! (It would have been better but had problems with my bank card).

Walgreens

Trans #1

3 Dimetapps- 3.99 each x 4= 11.97

- $5RR

- $2.00 dimetapp x3= $6

Subtotal- 0.97 = tax

Plus I received $10RR

Trans #2

6 Ragus 3/$5

4 Skippy PB 3/$5

- 10RR

- 1.00/2 x3 ragu

- 1.00/2 x2 skippy

Subtotal= 1.67 = tax

Plus I received a $5RR

OOP- $2.64 and I received $15RR so a profit of $12.36

Meijer

I normally don't go to Meijer but there was too good of a deal to pass up.

8- Taco Bell Salsa- 1.85 each = 14.80

15 (was supposed to be 16 forgot to scan one it was hiding under Kloe's seat)- Jellos= 10.43

0.64 x 12= 7.68

0.88 x 2= 1.76 (the pudding is more)

0.99 (the Tapioca is even more... I meant to have on more but got caught under Kloe)

3- Mac and Cheese 0.74 x 3= 2.22

- $1.50/1 x8 = 12.00 Taco Bell (meijer coupons)

- $1.50/2 x8= 12.00 Jello (meijer coupon)

Subtotal $3.45 + tax

SHE SMILED!!!!

2008-10-10T14:35:00.002-04:00

Kloe smiled today!!! And it wasn't just gas... she did it like 5 times and I got a picture!

1 month!

2008-10-03T10:41:00.005-04:00

My little girl is 1 month old and I can hardly believe it. It was quite a month to say the least. I really only expected her to be about two weeks right now. Never did I think that she would be 1 MONTH! I really do spend all my day with her (except the occasional trips to Walgreens when Chris is home :)). I don't want to be away from her. I spent a lot of time away from her in the beginning and leaving her now just seems ridiculous to me. Going from having her with me every single minute to not seeing her for 5 hours and then going over twelve hours was difficult and I'm just not ready to be away from her.

Beside from being in the NICU for the first week and then coming home and having a double ear infection (which by the way didn't go away with the first rounds of meds so we are on to a different kind) for the past two weeks, she is a GREAT baby! I love the fact that I have been able to breast feed her. I think back to when Caidan was this little and at six weeks he was already getting rice cereal and I just think that is crazy. Its funny how the second time around everything is different.

Well here are her stats for 1 month.

1 MONTH

9lbs 9oz

21 1/2 inches

Oh and we can't forget Caidan!!! He is the best biggest little brother ever. He is so sweet to her and tries to give her her paci all the time... even when she isn't crying. He gives her kisses all the time (even though his kisses are just putting his head to her head.) He is so sweet. I couldn't have asked for anything better. He's my little Ham! (I got the camera out to take the picture and he stood right in front of me and smiled!)

My Walgreens Trips!!

2008-09-28T11:11:00.004-04:00

I had an awesome week with Walgreens.

Here is what I got... (now remember this was done in several transactions!)

2- gallons of milk

4- packages of Oreos

4- Reach toothbrushes

6- Reach floss

2- cologate 360 toothbrush (only kind Chris will use and the were on sale)

12- 8 Packs candy- Kit Kats, Butterfingers, Snickers, Reeses

5- Crest mouthwash

2- cans of Oust

1- bag of Sour Patch Kids

3- Dimetapp

1- Excedrin

1- Crest Pro Health toothpaste

3- Garnier, shampoo and conditioner

3 Afrin nose spray

1- bag of little pony tails (they were .75 and I needed a filler! hey I have a girl now :) )

1- Visine

1- Opti Free Replenish eye drops (for hubby)

1- Reusable walgreens bag (not pictured I forgot about it)

Subtotal for EVERYTHING witout tax= 159.75

Total Saved- 156.29 (this includes instore savings and coupons)

Total OOP= $55.29

I will recieve- $25.01 back in rebates

and I still have 19.50 in RR

After MIR and RR I spent $10.78 on EVERYTHING!!

I AM SO EXCITED!!!! Now I just don't know what I am going to do with everything... just wait till next week! :)

???? of GOODNESS!!!

2008-09-23T14:03:00.003-04:00

Today we took Kloe to the doctor because she's not been acting herself and had me up a lot last night. She hadn't been eating right and something didn't seem right. She has a double ear infection. :( But the good thing I got to find out was how much she weighs... and she is 9lbs 2oz of goodness!!!! I couldn't believe it. I mean I knew she was putting on weight I just didn't think that much. When we brought her home from the hospital 2 weeks ago she was 7lbs 5oz that was on September 6th. When I took her to the doctor September 8th she was 7lbs 6oz. I just can't believe it. Mommas got good milk!!! :)

I never knew

2008-09-17T19:33:00.003-04:00

I never knew how much I could love my little girl. I told Chris the other day that I never thought I would love her this much! He asked me why and I told him because I didn't know that it was possible to love two kids so much!

When we found out we were having a girl I was very disappointed. I was even disappointed a lot through the pregnancy because I didn't know what to expect from a girl or how to treat a girl. I was kind of afraid that since I wanted another boy so bad that I wouldn't love her as much but to my surprise I love her SO MUCH!!! I get to dress her up and put bows in her hair. I just love everything about her. (okay maybe not when she is waking me up every two hours to feed in the middle of the night.) (By the way if anyone has breast feeding tips or advice I am all about it!)

The day Kloe May was born

2008-09-10T18:23:00.003-04:00

I play back the day Kloe was born in my head every time I look at her.

I went to Walgreens that late afternoon to do some pretty sweet deals. I had been having sharp pains in my lower stomach for a couple days and I had forgot to mention it to my doctor that Tuesday at my appointment. When I got in the car as I was leaving Walgreens the pains got really bad. I had to meet Chris at Walmart (he was on shift) and I told him about it. He told me to go to the hospital since he (and I knew I just didn't want to go knowing that I would go get shots and go home) knew thats what my doctor would say. I told him I would call my doctor. I tried to page him on my way to the hospital after my husband convinced me to go but by the time I got there he hadn't called me back (which is very unusual). I went to OB unit they hooked me up and of course with in 5 minutes I was given a shot. I was having contractions A LOT! I don't know if I was just so used to the contractions that I didn't even notice them or if they had just started either way I was having more than they liked. About 15 minutes later the nurse came into give me the second shot when she told me the news. She said she had just told the nurse that she didn't think my contractions were going to stop and right after she said that the on call doctor (will call him Cassidy) called and said give her one more shot if they don't stop in 20 minutes we will do a C-section (since I had one scheduled any way).

I was in COMPLETE SHOCK! Now everyone knows that I wanted that baby out more than anything but I seriously didn't expect that. I IMMEDIATELY called Chris and told him (i think he was in shock too). The problem was was right as I was calling Chris they got called out on a call. Now the nurse told me it wasn't an emergancy and they weren't rushing... GREAT! Now I didn't have to worry wether or not my husband was going to make it or not.

I honestly don't remember what time they had taken me back to the O.R. I know that I show Chris for a nano second (they let me give him a kiss and off I went). It was much different this time. I was more aware of what was going on then last time. It took three times to get my spinal (OUCH)!!!! Then I got really sick (I almost vomited but YEAH for me I didn't this time). It was just from the spinal because my blood pressure dropped so quickly. Luckily I told the anesthesiologist before hand and she had medicine on hand (she told me afterwards that she had to give me a lot more than normal for my blood pressure to go back up. Then they prepped me shaved me (which was a horrible shave job), put these cool little things on my legs that felt like they were being massage (even though I could feel them because haha my legs were numb), put iodine all over my belly and the next thing Cassidy says he's going to pinch my stomach to see if I feel anything (now i don't remember a lot from my first c-section but I do remember the my doctor asked me about this and I said i felt some thing and they askd if it was painful and I said no). So I am laying there Chris comes in Cassidy goes, "I'd shake your hand but that would probably not be good." Chris laughs and says something along the lines of Yeah that wouldn't be good. Then I look at Chris and he said I love you and I said I love you and I asked him if they had started and he said yeah they are almost at the baby! I was so confused because I thought they were going to ask me if I had felt anything... obviously I didn't. A couple minutes later she was born and the doc said she's a good weight. I was dying to see her. I was so overwhelmed by the fact that I was a mother AGAIN! (and that she didn't have red hair- God knows I couldn't handle it).

It wasn't long after that that I was wheeled into my room. My mother in law and one of my best friends was standing out there and I asked how much she weighed and they said 7lbs 9oz! I was laughing! I just delivered a 36 weeker who was 7lbs 9oz! I could have had a 9lb baby if she would have waited. I remember sitting in the room with the after surgery nurse (there is a name I just can't remember) as she was doing everything she was doing and my mother in law and friend came into the room. Not to long after that the pediatrician came in and said that she was having a little trouble breathing and they were just giving her some oxygen to give her some help. Then Chris walked in and I saw his face. It wasn't a good face. He was worried. But some how through everything I stayed calm. I knew she would be okay. Then the pediatrician came in again informing us that she was going to need to be transferred. They couldn't get her breathing under control enough to make them happy. She was breathing a little faster than normal. Chris came in bawling and I had cried a tear. I really didn't know what he had been going through. They told us that the team that was coming to get her would be there around 1:30am and they would let me see her and then take her to the hospital.

I was doing okay until the wheeled her in on a cot in a incubator type thing. I waited till she left and I lost it. My little girl who was about 5 hours old I had only got to see for five minutes. I hadn't even had the chance to hold her. And I had really no good pictures of her. Only two polaroids from the hospital that the nurse had taken for me. But not long after I was okay and feel asleep with the help of some benedryl because I get an allergic reaction to the medicine that helps me not get sick in surgery.

I went to bed that night knowing that they were going to let me go home the next day as long as I could get up and walk around okay and was urinating okay (because of the catheter). That morning came and I couldn't wait to see her and hold her. I got to hold her that day and the next and the next and the next. But unless you have ever had your child in the NICU you will never know what I have felt.

I think about her first week and how as a mom you have so much planned to do all her first things. And all those things didn't happen or just got delayed. I wasn't the first one to feed her, I wasn't the first one to give her a sponge bath, I wasn't the first one to get to "really" hold her. I cherish ever minute with her now because I honestly don't know what I would do with out her. The hardest thing I have ever had to do was leave her that first night. I knew she was in good hands but to not be there her first night and wake up with her when she cried was hard. Did I enjoy and needed my much needed sleep? YES! but I would trade that any day to have her with me her first night.

It was a big struggle for us to have her in the hospital for those 7 days but I thank God each and every day that my little girl is perfect! I thank him that it was only 7 days and not longer because I was getting really depressed. It was a hard pregnancy with her and I didn't expect it to be a hard week after she was born. But now that she is here I can't believe it. I LOVE HER more than I thought I ever could.

WE ARE HOME!!!!

2008-09-06T19:40:00.002-04:00

I currently don't have time to say anything other than WE ARE ALL HOME!!!!

Chris, Kalla, Caidan and (with much anticipation) Kloe!

(okay it really funny because all our names except Chris' are "misspelled!!! :))

Our little princess

2008-09-03T15:55:00.003-04:00

Kloe is our little princess. She is improving greatly. It's still slow but she is doing great. They did put her back on a nasal canula because her breathing was still a little too much but she is doing better with it and its just pushing air through her nose. It isn't oxygen!

Yesterday was the first day they fed her with a bottle and she was SO EXCITED! Yesterday they started her on 20cc which is about 1/2 ounce and then today they uped it to 40cc. She takes it in about 5 minutes! She is a piggy! We don't know when she will be coming home yet. There are three main things that she has to do in order for us to leave....

She needs to be eating consitantly from a bottle or breast

She needs to be gaining weight

She needs to be off everything (IV and nasal canula)

Kloe May Update

2008-08-31T14:26:00.003-04:00

This was yesterday and the first time I got to hold her!!!!!

This is her today!!!
(her arm isn't in her sleeve because she as the IV in that arm!)

Kloe is doing great. Yesterday (early morning around 3AM) she arrived at County Dupage hospital where they hooked her up to a CPAP, gave her an IV and put a whole bunch of wires on her. She as breathing a little faster than what they wanted. She is a healthy chuncky little girl for her age. Her lungs just hadn't matured enough when she came out.

As of today she is doing a lot better. She is off the CPAP and we should be able to start feeding her today. I will try to update more when I know more.

Thank you so much for the prayers!!! We are praying everyday for her to get stronger so she can come home with us!

Kloe Update

2008-08-30T11:47:00.005-04:00

Here is a picture for you all to enjoy!!!! I am on my way to see her now so I will take more pictures of her so we can all love her!!!!!

Kalla

First off, Kloe was 19 inches longer, shorter than Caidan was but she weighed more than him!

Early this morning, Kloe was taken to a nearby hospital because her lungs were not working as strong as needed. She is currently on oxygen and a feeding tube, just in case it is needed. The doctors are optimistic that everything will be fine and no long term damage is apparent. Kalla is being released from the hospital today, so that she can be with Kloe.

Please keep Kalla, Chris, Caidan, and Kloe in your praryers during this time.
Kalla is going to post pictures as soon as possible.

Baby Girl has arrived

2008-08-30T08:08:00.003-04:00

This is Betsy. I have hijacked Kalla's blog to announce:

Kloe May Ronning was delivered by c-section last night, August 29, 2008 at 9:26 pm (central time). She weighed 7 lbs, 9 oz--at 4 weeks early!!!!!
Mom and baby are doing great. This was a quick delivery and we are so thankful that after everything Kalla has been through that the baby is great and here!
My mom is heading up this morning, so more details soon, either from me or Kalla posting!

Playing outside

2008-08-28T09:48:00.004-04:00

Caidan loves to be outside. But the problem is he is every where and hard for me to keep track of so I don't normally play outside with him unless Chris is home. Last night Chris was home (very few nights that he is) so we went and played outside. I got this slide for him at a garage sale but when I bought it he was a little to little... but not anymore. The first thing he did was climb up the slide. And the tractor my sisters or sister (I don't remember) got it for him and he loves to push it and sit on it backwards... he is a ham!!!! He tries to ride the tractor but his legs are a little to small!

P.S. I am almost done with my binder and will show you everything... Jill I got the baseball card holders at walmart by the baseball cards in the front. (thanks to my wonderful sister!!!) I had to buy another binder that they came with but that was the only way I had found them.

I admit it!!!

2008-08-25T21:08:00.004-04:00

I admit that I am a coupon-aholic! I buy at least 4 papers a weekend and I know where I can find them on Saturday and for only a $1. I also am a Walgreens-aholic!!! (If you have a CVS buy you I highly recommend CVS but the closet one to me is about 30-40 minutes and not so much a grea deal when you are paying so much for gas... but my sister does this and just the other week she made MONEY buying diaper!!!!) Anyways...

I love to shop with coupons and I love to play the game (thats how I describe couponing its a game!!!) Its been kind of hard in the condition that I am in at the moment meaning that a lot of times I will just buy something where I am even though I know its cheaper at a different store but getting around is a very big challenge and needless to say I am supposed to be on bed rest. I also try to buy diapers for $7 or less. I have a stockpile of diapers in the basement for the new baby. I am not as good as some people but I am still learning and I am still having FUN!

You really want to know how into this I am check out my coupon Binder....

Its pretty and pink (of course) and its not finished yet because it requires a lot of me so I work on it a little at a time. But its so organized and I can see all the coupons that I need. I love it!

And I sign up for freebies all the time from website I go to and just today I recieved my free Swiffer sweeper!!!!!! SO EXCITING!!!

4 WEEKS!!!!

2008-08-20T13:03:00.002-04:00

The last couple of days have been interesting...

I ended up spending ALL afternoon in the hospital. I went to my scheduled doctors appointment yesterday where he put me on the monitor (to check the baby and see if I was contracting) and sure enough I was... and they were pretty strong. I was given 3 shots before they stopped enough. (it didn't really work I am still having them today just not as bad and not as frequently.) I am not dilated at all so I guess we just wait. This is about the same time with Caidan when I did start contracting though and continued to contract for 3 weeks.

My husband is working a butt load lately so it kind of makes things difficult for me. Most of the help that I have been getting all go to school or work at a school and school starts Monday. Chris' mom is unable to help due to surgery she had on her shoulder two weeks ago. So it looks like starting next week its just Caidan and I. We'll see....

We started to paint the babies room... only after painting two coats I didn't like it... :) It was supposed to be pink and its pink/purple... its very strange. So now we have to go get more paint in a different color and Chris has to paint again!

Thats what is happening in our world.

GROSS... just gross!

2008-08-16T21:11:00.002-04:00

So this afternoon I realized that I can't let Caidan go to bed with out pants or shorts on. I really thought that the first time was just because he was bored and it was really full.

This afternoon I get him up from his nap and AGAIN he is naked. I didn't see any poop everythings is GREAT. UNTIL... I put him to bed... (i need some kind of freak scary music to add)

I had his diaper changed , gave him his cup, laid him in bed, moved his blankets and found a BIG SOLID TURD!!!!! This time I don't think that he had pooped in his diaper and played with it... no I think that he took his diaper of and then made a huge TURD!!!! (Can I emphasize TURD anymore?) That TURD had been sitting in his bed ALL day...

Its just GROSS... GROSS... GROSS!

4 WEEKS 6 DAYS

2008-08-14T10:58:00.003-04:00

4 WEEKS 6 DAYS

We have decided to go the C-section route. Which only means that I have 4 weeks 6 days until this little baby girl will be out of me!!!! HALLELUJAH!!

We decided about a month ago (maybe I decided) to go ahead with a planned c-section. At that time it was for the reason that I didn't want to get my hopes up about my placenta moving and then what if it didn't? And being in and out of the hospital didn't help either. I also didn't have a very good experience with Caidans birth and didn't want to end up being in labor for three days and turn around and have another emergency c-section because she was TOO big and I couldn't pass her (I feel like I am describing something very disgusting.) I would actually love to have another emergency c-section because it goes by so fast and I don't have time to think of what's going to happen (I know I am crazy!) September 17th is the schedule day for her to arrive into this world.

As far as how I am doing everything is going great. My placenta did move and is far enough away that they aren't worried anymore. I haven't been back to the hospital in about 3 weeks !YES! and I am getting around good. I am more exhausted then ever... my whole body hurts more than I thought it could ever hurt... I don't think that my stomach can stretch any bigger but my doctor reassured me that it can... Its been a difficult 8 months but I know that in 4 weeks 6 days that everything will be worth it.

Caidan is a boy... and I mean that. He loves to be outside... He loves our neighbor who is an older guy but both of them some how understand each other... He really is a toddler now and its scary... He climbs on EVERYTHING! IF he can't get up on something he finds something to push over to it to get up on it. He doesn't even drink from a bottle anymore. He is EXTREMELY smart! I think you just don't think as a parent that your child can comprehend things but boy does he understand MORE than I am aware of. He is truly one of the best things in the world that has happened to me and I can't wait till i can play with him more in 4 weeks 6 days.

Here is Caidan in the hole that our neighbor was digging to fix his fence.

Caidan touched the dirt and that was it... he doesn't like his hands messy... only when he is eating a fruit bar... thats our dog Mason making sure he is okay!

He loves his lawn mower but he loves the real one 100x more!!!

I can't believe it....

2008-08-13T12:00:00.003-04:00

So if you read Angela's blog... then you have probably read this story... (which makes me laugh)... Until today (actually it still makes me laugh just because its Angela!!! haha!)

This morning I walked into Caidan's room to get him out of bed (because Chris wasn't home yet). When I walked in he was dropping his pants over the crib. I laugh and asked him how got is pants off (a big mystery to me) then i look even closer and I see that my little boy is NAKED!!! OH MY LORDY! (have you ever watched Jon and Kate plus 8 and you know how she freaks out when something isn't planned... yeah thats what I sounded like). As I got closer I saw POOP! Then it was a bigger OH MY LORDY!!!! I didn't know where to start... Caidan's just standing in his crib smilling and giggling... of course he had the fun part. Luckily it was that bad to clean up.... I thought I had a while until he had figured that one out... Oh well what do you do! I wish I would have had my camera but I didn't... oh well maybe next time!

1 YEAR OLD!!!

2008-07-19T14:44:00.003-04:00

Caidan turned 1!!! I can hardly believe it. I don't know how one year can go by so fast. In one year he went from being in me to being a toddler. He walks, eats big boy foods, most of the time he can communicate what he wants. I would never trade this past year for anything. Caidan is my joy. His smile and bright blue eyes could make any bodies day happier... at least I know it does

for me. Here's some pictures of the past year!

BED REST!!!!

2008-07-14T20:32:00.002-04:00

UGH!!!! I am now on bed rest and for who knows how long. We had Caidans 1st birthday party Saturday (I'll have pictures later) and just before the last person left my contractions came back. I started taking my oh so lovely pills but half an hour later they were still coming. So of course I called the doctor who then sent us to the hospital again (this is the third time). They then gave me two shots of the not so fun medicine and ran a test again to see if i was going to go into labor. It came back negative again (thank you God)! He then sent me home on bed rest this time.

If everyone could pray for my husband who has now taken on all the responsibilities. I think as moms we just naturally do it but at least for my husband taking care of EVERYTHING doesn't come so natural and he is very nervous about me and the baby. And I know i have asked for pray a lot lately but right now our main goal is to keep this baby in as long as possible. And also for Caidan as it is a BIG adjustment for him and he doesn't understand why mama can't pick him up or do anything with him. And for myself... the stress of the whole thing is enough but not being able to take care of my son is very difficult. We (Caidan and I) are used to a schedule with each other and it works and now that different people are taking care of him all the time its very hard on both of us. Moms are supposed to take care of their kids and thats the biggest challenge I am having. To not be able to pick up your child is hard.

Maybe I spoke too soon

2008-07-08T10:11:00.003-04:00

Well I ended up back in the hospital yesterday all day. I was having backpains and some contractions and my pelvis was having some pains. I ended up being at the hospital ALL day! I got two liters of fluid and one shot of breathaine and after about an hour of being on the breathaine I started to contract again. So the doctor sent me home on oral breathaine. Again baby is doing great... everyone comments on how active she is and how great she looks.

I am still not on complete bedrest (THANK GOD! I have Caidan's birthday party this weekend) but I am on limited activity. And supposed to drink plenty of fluids which I have been doing.

If everyone could pray for us that would be great. I am lucky to have my mom here this week to help with everything... I just wish I could keep her longer. But the medicine they have me on makes me very jittery and shaking and not feeling the greatest. I also have to take it around the clock every four hours which means I have to set an alarm for 2am and 6am to wake up and take the medicine.

Thanks to everyone for keeping us in your prayers!

In Kalla's world...

2008-07-05T21:49:00.003-04:00

I ended up in the hospital Wednesday morning. I woke up having contractions and within about two hours I had had about 15. Now you might be thinking oh they were probably just braxton hicks...but they weren't. I was given a liter of fluid to try to "hydrate" me (they saw if you are dehydrated that can cause contractions) which didn't work. We then moved one to a shot called Breathene. The only problem with this medicine is it makes your heart race and you get really jittery... its not great. We did one shot and it didn't stop it all so we had to move on to a second shot where I haven't had once since. I also found out I had a UTI which could have caused the early contractions. But all that to say I am doing good now. I am taking it easy and trying not to do too much (but come on I have a 1 year old!!!)

I can't believe that in two weeks Caidan will be 1! He is becoming a little man and its so very scary. He is walking like crazy now and whenever he wants he goes upstairs by himself. (of course with out my permission.

Here is a picture of me from yesterday...

It's been a long time!

2008-06-07T15:21:00.006-04:00

I know its been a long time! A lot has happened in almost month. We went on our first family vacation and it was just okay.

We ended up going to Birchwood, WI where we went

fishing and just hung out! We (Caidan, Chis and I) ended up all sleeping in one room and that was not so much fun. It was also very cold up there and just not the greatest weather for fishing and compared to last year I caught nothing!!! So needless to say I was really bummed.

Caidan has been very busy also... he has now taken SEVEN steps all by himself. He also decided that he was going to fall out of his crib. Which made me freaked out and then he also slid out of the bath tub... he's just my little monkey! He climbs on everything and anything he wants too.

I know I haven't posted a belly picture lately so here it is!

I have been feeling good I guess... its just a lot harder the second time around because I have Caidan to take care of and chase around. I asked Chris last night if he could just snap his fingers and it would be September... he said he would if he could! I did however go and get fitted for a bra...:-D! I am so big! They told me I was a 32H! Holy Cow-I know!

Birthday Weekend!

2008-05-19T10:49:00.006-04:00

I am now 22! I am so old (haha not really)! I had a GREAT birthday. Chris had been acting a little strange the days before and I thought he was planning something special for me. (All i told him I wanted for my birthday was to go to Olive Garden and go see a movie!) But instead I got an even better surprise- MY SISTERS!!!!!

My sisters mean the world to me not only are the my sister but they are my best friends by far!!! My sisters made me whoppi pies (if you don't know what those are I am really really sorry!!!!) On Saturday (my birthday) we went shopping for fabric for baby k's quilt! Went to lunch at Olive Garden (the only reason I wanted Olive Garden was because I had been craving the salad for weeks.) We then came home went and saw my mim and papa got some Custard and went crazy with our hair!!!! I colored mine! :) and Betsy permed hers!

And then Sara took Amazing pictures of Caidan!

Here's the update!

2008-05-10T17:13:00.002-04:00

Well I went to the doctor yesterday where the did a very thorough ultrasound. Baby Girl is perfect and growing bigger everyday and very healthy! YEAH!!! But they did confirm that I have a low lying placenta. Right now my placenta is 1 cm away from my cervix. At this point they aren't do anything he said that as my uterus grows bigger the placenta should move up. He wants to scan me at 27 weeks to make sure that is has moved away. But right now I don't have to change my activity level or anything. I may experience bleeding from the placenta being so low but unless it gets really heavy there is nothing to worry about. So it good news maybe not what I wanted to hear but all in all its good!

Thanks for praying!

Please Pray!

2008-05-08T13:58:00.004-04:00

Tuesday I went to the doctor and they did an ultrasound and found that I have a low lying placenta (they worry that this could turn into placenta previa). Because of that I am going to see a perinatologist (a high risk obstetrician) tomorrow morning. Everyone that I have talked to said that its nothing to worry about because most of the time it corrects its as the uterus gets bigger but I have also heard that the normally wait to send you to see the perinatologist until after a month of so or finding it. So I am a little worried about it. I didn't get a chance to talk to m doctor about it because he was seeing other patients after my ultra sound. Its just been a tough pregnancy and I feel like we have gone back and forth on it all. I was just hoping for a "normal" pregnancy... whatever that is. So I just hope that everything goes okay tomorrow and that he tells me I have nothing to worry about (even though I feel like I need to worry).

Also here is a belly picture... I really look bigger than this... I think its just my big BOOBS! :)

First Trip to the Zoo

2008-05-06T10:42:00.003-04:00

Caidan and I went to the Zoo the other day. It was his first trip... He didn't really care... but I had fun.

It's exciting!

2008-05-01T20:33:00.003-04:00

I can't believe that I found out what the sex of the baby was today...

and I am sure you are all dying to know...

But maybe I will just have to wait and tell you another day...

IT'S A GIRL!!!!

9 months!

2008-04-26T21:21:00.004-04:00

I can't believe that 9 months has gone by and my little boy is SO big (well actually he is little).

We had his 9 month check up the other day and get this...

he weighs 18lbs 140z (25% for weight)

he is 28 3/4 inches (70% for height)

and I don't know what his head measured but it was in the 80%.

I just think that its funny that my son has a big head! I love it!!

He loves the camera and Sara!

He really looks like me here. This is the first time that I have looked at him in a picture and thought "oh my gosh its me!" Its kind of weird!

(I just want to know why nobody told me that my boobs were bigger than my sons head! :))

I'm here!!!

2008-04-17T11:08:00.003-04:00

I am in Cincinnati for the weekend!! Caidan and I drove in yesterday. I was kind of scared to drive all the way by myself with him but to my surprise he did very very very well! Only one major breakdown. So if any one wants to get together or anything give me a call.

:) :) :) :)

Depression...

2008-04-05T20:12:00.003-04:00

I wrote this almost a year ago!
I don't know if it’s normal to feel how I feel all the time. I used to feel so good about myself. I used to feel pretty. I used to be active. I used to love to go shopping. I used to love a lot that I can’t even think of doing now. I used to be happy.Now I just feel like crap all the time. I don't feel pretty anymore (despite how many times my husband tells me I am beautiful). And I don't feel good about myself. I am hardly active anymore just going to the grocery to get milk is a painful. The thought of how much I weigh at the moment disgust me (even though I know that I have a growing healthy baby). I am more excited to get this child out of me than to actually see him and that makes me sad. I watch all these babies shows where are all the woman are so excited to be pregnant and they just love being pregnant blah blah blah… and it actually makes me sick and sometimes I want to punch them. And all of that makes me feel so selfish. I want this baby more than anything and I should be enjoying all the kicks and movements (which I do) but I feel so guilty for wanting it out. There are so many women that never get the chance to be pregnant and here I am whining and complaining about it. I JUST WANT ME BACK!

While I read that it makes me sad to think that I felt all those things but truth be told I'm at it again. Except this time I think its worse. I'd like to feel different- I'd LOVE to feel different. My husband told me the other day that I'm never happy anymore and he just wants me happy and that really in a way hurt me. It didn't hurt me because it was hurtful thing to say but I didn't notice myself how unhappy I was. Everyone who knows me knows that I am not a person that is bothered by much but everything bothers me now. My son bothers me... my dogs bother me... I get frustrated when my son gets up from a nap... I get frustrated when Chris is 2 minutes late coming home from work... I get frustrated because I am pregnant again and how in the world am I going to take care of two (I put that midly!)... I don't sleep much anymore... I really don't take care of myself as much...
I talked to my doctor and I am seeing a therapist.

It's very frustrating to me. I want to LOVE being pregnant and LOVE everything that comes with it and I don't. It really is hard to explain to anyone and to make people understand how I feel seems impossible sometimes. I just wish that the doctor and therapist can help. Please pray from Chris, Caidan and I.

CF husband

2008-04-02T19:45:00.002-04:00

So I have been reading this blog for a couple months now. Nate and Tricia are truly an inspiration to all. Tricia has CF and has been waiting for a double lung transplant for I believe a little over a month now and as I type this she is in the OR getting ready to have two new lungs! I don't know Tricia or Nate I found the blog through another blog and instantly I feel in love with there family.

PLEASE PLEASE pray from them now as they grow through this process. And also for there little baby girl!

First Fire Pics

2008-03-26T22:25:00.003-04:00

So here is Caidan at 8 months! I know I know too cute... you can tell me all about it! :) He is growing faster than I know what to do... its kind of sad!

Leap and bounds!

2008-03-24T12:08:00.003-04:00

We had fun with Photobooth!!! :)

My son is growing by leaps and bounds and I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!?

Caidan can do all the following:

Rollover (front and back)

Hold his own bottle

Eat Cherrios whole and by himself

Crawl (like speed racer)

Pull himself up on anything (even a wall)

Stand for a few seconds by himself (only if he does it)

Sleeps ALL night! (Thank you Lord Jesus)

He pulls his legs to his chest in his play pen

Smiles uncontrollably

Knows the word NO (and chooses to ignore you)

Climbs the stairs

Trying to be sneaking and feed the dogs cherrios

Waves Bye-Bye

Sits in a big boy carseat

Wears a size 4 shoe

Says Mama and Dada and a whole bunch of other things I'm sure mean something

Sometimes I miss those moments where they just don't do anything but I really love to watch him grow but its just sooo fast!!1

13 weeks!

2008-03-21T20:02:00.003-04:00

EDIT: I know everyone wants to know if we are having a boy or a girl but we have decided not to find out. I was not to excited about it at first but now I am excited. I don't care wether its a boy or a girl. I want a boy for a reason and I want a girl for a reason but either way I don't care. So we will wait and see....

Don't they say when you get to the second trimester that the "morning sickness" is supposed to go away??? I beg to differ! I am actually getting better. Each day is different- I still vomit every morning- I still can't eat ice cream, cookies, pop, anything with a lot of sugar- I'm still on medicine. I am trying to get myself off but I know I still need it- I am still going to the doctor every two weeks. Last doctor visit I found out I had a some sort of bladder infection. They gave me medicine but I decided not to take it because I feel like I am on so much medicine already (and it made me vomit A LOT!) I am in bed every night after I put Caidan to bed (7:30). I wake up at 3:30am every morning and toss and turn for 2 hours until I finally get to sleep and then Chris' alarm goes off and for the next hour I am pushing the snooze button and by the time he gets up Caidan is getting ready to wake up.

This pregnancy doesn't even feel like I am pregnant maybe its because I have Caidan to think about and handle every day and it feels like its going so ssssslllllloooooowwww! I am looking pregnant- when you have your second one you just pop out all of a sudden. But who cares?? Here are two pictures since you asked- you an see my lovely stretch marks from my son... :) YUM!

Giggle boy!

2008-03-18T20:10:00.003-04:00

I started squirting Caidan with this toy tonight and he just started giggling... I had to share!!!

Caidan Kisses!

2008-03-12T12:17:00.002-04:00

Caidan learned how to give kisses and it is the cutest thing in the world!

Caidan at Easter

2008-03-06T18:09:00.005-05:00

I know he was cute a little bit ago but look at these.....

What have I wished for?

2008-03-04T19:08:00.004-05:00

So this week Caidan learned to sit up on his own and pull himself up on EVERYTHING. Now I really wanted him to do both of those things... and now i wish he still just rolled and kid of crawled. Typically our playtime involves Caidan climbing on the couch, falling on his head (he doesn't understand that he has to balance himself), crying or screaming, me telling him he is okay, and him doing it all over. And he has to be going every minute of every day... unless he is sleeping. And with learning to pull himself up he has become an excellent crawler- which for a parent involves the word no a million times a day. But I am learning to pick my battles. If its something that I don't really want him to have but its not going to hurt him WHY NOT? He's not screaming and its quit in the house.

I also told my job today that I won't becoming back. Being pregnant and sick I couldn't imagine working and even the thought of Chili's food just makes me want to vomit. And honestly these past 5 weeks that I have been home all the time with Caidan has made me realize that I don't want to miss out on all the things he is learning. He is talking so much more. Just a week ago the only thing he was saying was Gagagagaga (which I think was dog) now he says lalalala and Mananama (which we think his Mama) and Nadanadanada (which we think is dad).

Well here are pictures of Baby #2.

This is when the baby was 7 weeks and 4 days.

This is from last week 9 weeks 4 days!

Baby's due date is September 26th!

You don't have to tell me

2008-02-26T14:21:00.003-05:00

Really, seriously you don't have to tell me that my son is the cutest little boy in the whole world... I mean come on look at him...

Caidan Movin'

2008-02-20T11:50:00.002-05:00

I thought this time it would be different...

2008-02-15T21:43:00.003-05:00

So I thought that since I started this pregnancy so great that this pregnancy would be completely different than Caidan but I was wrong oh so wrong!

The six week hit and I was sick and it hasn't stopped since. This time around is 10x worse than with Caidan. Then to top it off at 6 weeks I had some spotting. It was the most scariest thing in the world. I didn't know what to do... I hadn't seen my doc yet and wouldn't have for one more week. I called a few people and the advised me to call my doc so I paged him (I really really love my doc!) He called back and said that he wanted to see my the next day (Monday) and to just rest. I went in the next day and the did the whole first exam (you women know) and said that there was some bleeding blah blah blah. Also he put me on some medicine for being sick (which everything that I read about it said that it was great and worked... yeah didn't work for me.) He also said that he wanted me to go for an ultrasound next week.

This past Tuesday we went for our first ultrasound. I saw something different in the ultrasound and asked what that was. She said it was a bleed and that the doc would explain it. At that time I was a little worried. Why couldn't she just tell me??? Well after waiting a little the doc came in and told us that that "bleed" was a vanishing twin (YES A TWIN!) but didn't make it. He assured us that it was common (1 out 8 women) and that I should be okay but no heavy lifting and someother things for two weeks and he wanted to repeat the ultrasound in two weeks.

So here I sit very very sick and just waiting for this time to past. It been a hard two weeks. I haven't been able to enjoy Caidan like I want. He doesn't get much of my attention if any right now. But I have to say that he really is the best baby in the world.

So please keep us all in your prayers as we go through this rough stage... again. And pray for my husband because he has taken on a lot since I have gotten sick and he is the most amazing man ever!!!!

Caidan's first haircut!

2008-02-09T20:29:00.001-05:00

Caidans hair was looking really shaggy so we needed to cut it!

Caidan in motion

2008-02-04T19:55:00.001-05:00

Caidan has almost mastered crawling! Here he is in motion!

1 year!!!

2008-01-30T17:19:00.000-05:00

I have been married to my husband for 1 year now! This year has been the best year of my life!

I married the best man in the world! And lucky for me he puts up with me each and every day. I knew when we had Caidan that Chris would be an AMAZING dad but what I didn't know is how much I would fall in love with him more because of Caidan. He's sensitive, caring, hard working, stubborn :), and most importantly LOVING! I would never want to spend the rest of my life with anyone else but him! I love you forever and ever!

Yet again! And Caidan is 6 months!

2008-01-22T00:22:00.001-05:00

Well we found out today that we are....

PREGNANT!!!!

We are just pregnant meaning I am about 4 weeks! So the baby is due near the end of September. It was a TOTAL shock... but we are excited and thrilled! (I mean how can you not be excited for a little tiny miracle!?) Caidan and the baby will be about 14 months a part. A little close but hopefully they will be best buds (yeah we are hoping for another boy).

On another note Caidan turned 6 months on Friday! He is doing so much. He is at the beginning of crawling meaning he is just starting to get on all fours. He is 27 inches long and weighs 15 lbs 15oz! He can almost sit all by himself. He is so big! I can't believe in six months they can change so much!

RSV

2008-01-09T23:05:00.001-05:00

So this past month has been exhausting!

Caidan had an ear infection about a month ago... he was put on antibiotics.

I started a new job working as a server at Chili's! (I love it!!!)

We went to Cincinnati for Christmas! It was fun and exciting!

Caidan was diagnosed with RSV. For the past week we have been dealing with that. He is A LOT better now. It was a scary thing and still is but he is better!

Christmas 2007

2008-01-01T22:35:00.000-05:00

It was Caidan's first Christmas and it was fun. Even though he had no idea what was really going on I think he enjoyed it.

We spent Christmas Eve with Chris' family and Caidan had fun.

Christmas Eve after leaving Chris' parents we made our way down to Cincinnati. We spent Christmas Day with my family. My sisters hadn't seen Caidan since September. He has grown so much since then so they were excited!

No one ever tells you

2007-12-20T03:41:00.000-05:00

No one ever tells you how difficult it is for you when your baby is sick.

Tonight Caidan vomited for the first time and THANK YOU GOD... Chris was home. Caidan was sleeping and Chris heard him gasping for air when he ran in there and he had vomited everywhere... and in about two hours he has vomited five times. As his mom I am freaking out! I don't know how to make my baby better. I can't call the doctor because it is in the middle of the night so I basicly have to watch him in pain and it is extremely sad. These are the things that people don't tell you when you have kids. Chris said tonight, "Now I know why everyone says you freak out with your first kid."

Its almost three in the morning and I have gotten maybe an hour of sleep. I can't fall asleep because everytime I do Caidan starts getting sick again. Luckily (knock on wood) its been an hour since he last threw up. He really has nothing left in him to throw up. (I spoke to soon)

For me as a mom I feel like I have done something wrong. I think of all the things that I have done that could have made him sick. As a parent you feel guilty!

It doesn't even matter how tired I am I would do this every night if he was sick... (God please don't let him be sick every night!)

Merry Merry Christmas

2007-12-14T10:37:00.000-05:00

Merry Merry Christmas to all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Caidan and Me

2007-11-28T10:54:00.000-05:00

Sometimes Caidan and I just relax... here is one of those days!

4 months

2007-11-24T20:45:00.000-05:00

Well Caidan is 4 months old and I can't even believe it! I know I say that ALL the time but come on... you as paremts know what I mean when I say that... you just can't believe that your babies are growing up!

We had his 4 month check up last Wednesday and I was nervous. Caidan doesn't eat that much and I was just scarred that I wasn't doing something right... but I had nothing to worry about because she said he is doing FANTASTIC!

He weighs 14lbs 3oz and 25 inches long! He is very long and slender. He needs 3 months pants but because he is so long I have to get him 6 month pants... I don't know where he gets his height from either! He is also teething which can be very painful for him and us at times. Caidan doesn't cry that often... but since he has begun teething sometimes he just lets out the biggest scream/cry I have ever heard. He is trying to roll over... I am not letting him (haha) not really I just want him to take his time. I want him to know that he doesn't need to rush it. Caidan has never really taken formula very well- i mean he takes it but he doesn' drink a lot. We have moved him to baby food and he devours it! We have noticed that he likes Bananas the best. He can eat two containers in one sitting! :)

Thats my little mister... I know he is too cute! That is why I love him more than I could ever tell you!!!

Dane Cook and Caidan

2007-11-16T15:36:00.000-05:00

Dane Cook was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! It was well worth the money and I would do it again in a heart beat! The picture of him doesn't do justice of how close we are but I didn't even have to zoom in! :) I love my husband so much for getting the tickets!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well Caidan has found his voice and he sure likes to talk! And I honestly don't mind it either... its just so darn CUTE! WE LOVES HIM!

Caidans first boo-boo

2007-11-10T14:01:00.001-05:00

So Caidan got his first boo-boo the other day. We were all laying on the bed and the dogs were playing with there toy when I took it from them and through it. I threw it in the opposite direction of Caidan but Charlie decided he was going to go right over Caidan and he scratched his head. If you look at the picture below you can see the scratch on his eye lid. You really can't tell its there unless he is sleeping and its kind of swollen around his eye but not really. It was very tramatic for moma as you can tell. But Mister Caidan is doing okay and he never has seemed like anything was wrong. (and yes he did cry but not very long).

Caidan talks A LOT

2007-11-05T10:03:00.000-05:00

Caidan is getting so big! Here is a little video of him "talking".

Pumpkin Patch and 3 months

2007-10-23T22:24:00.000-04:00

I am THREE weeks old... can you believe it?? I can't either! Moma and Dada say I am getting so BIG! but I don't think I am that big. I still can't do verything that I want to. I can't sit up (and trust me I try... I wonder what my face looks like when I am trying), I can't walk, and I can't figure out why sometimes my hands move and sometimes they don't. So I don't think that I am getting to big... I will let everyone know when I am getting big.

Well moma decided to take my pictures the other day and here is what she got...

I think if you ask me... I look pretty darn cute!

Last weekend Moma and Dada had a day off together and we went to the Pumpkin Farm with our friends....

This is me falling asleep on my moma... she's just so good to me!

Here is me looking at Dada as he takes a picture of me and while Moma holds me.

This is me trying to stand up by the pumpkins... I was kind of tired!

This is my friend Lily... Moma says she's cute... I don't know what I think of her. :)

These are my good friends Abbey and Madie... I think I might like them.

Happy Sweetest Day... TO ME!

2007-10-20T10:36:00.000-04:00

I really have the best husband in the world...

November 3rd will be the best day in the whole entire world... and you know why?

The best comedian in the world is coming to Chicago and guess who is going...??

ME!

Chris is the best husband in the world! He got tickets for us to see DANE COOK!

And not only did he get tickets but he got tickets that are six rows away from the stage. See where the picture below says 1... thats where I will be sitting on November 3rd.

Our Family

2007-10-18T20:57:00.000-04:00

Our Family- My Family!

I love my family. We got our first picture taken a couple weeks ago and I am so excited! We are a FAMILY!!! I mean I knew we were from the beginning after Caidan was born but actually seeing a picture of us...IT'S GREAT!

Caidan was sick this past weekend... he got his first fever. :( It was very sad- he was miserable- i was miserable- we were all miserable. But he is getting better now and he is getting SO BIG!

About a month ago we went to one of the state parks around... we took a lot of pictures. I am sure Caidan enjoyed it... he slept the whole time while daddy held him.

My baby is growing up... :(

2007-10-11T23:22:00.000-04:00

So nothing special here... I just started a new job... sad but exciting at the same time. On the days that Chris and I work Caidan goes to my Grandmas (his great grandmas) and I wouldn't have it any other way. She adores him and I don't worry about him at all... I miss him A LOT but I am very thankful!

Our First Parade

2007-10-04T18:30:00.000-04:00

So last weekend we went to the Homecoming Parade... it was also Caidan's first parade! Jamie and the girls joined us and it was a blast!

Here is Abbey and Caidan while we waited for the parade

And here is me and Caidan before the parade... I JUST LOVE HIM!!!

This is what Caidan did the WHOLE parade... oh well I guess there is always next year!

This is Maddison looking too cute....

And this is what Chris rode in during the parade!

We had a blast... now I can't wait till next year when Caidan can really enjoy!!

Tell me a story

2007-10-02T21:05:00.000-04:00

So Caidan is starting to use his voice A LOT more... the only problem his he knows he can cry now.

And yes that was him try to sit up!!! I tell him all the time that he is too little and he needs to stay little for a long time... but he doesn't listen to his mommy.

I Wish You Could... I wish I could

2007-09-27T23:21:00.000-04:00

I wish you could see the sadness of a business man as his livelihood goes up in flames, or that family returning home, only to find their house and belongings damaged or lost for good.

I wish you could know what it is like to search a burning bedroom for trapped children, flames rolling above your head, your palms and knees burning as you crawl, the floor sagging under your weight as the kitchen below you burns.

I wish you could comprehend a wife's horror at 3 a.m. as I check her husband of 40 years for a pulse and find none. I start CPR anyway, hoping to bring him back, knowing intuitively it is too late. But wanting his wife and family to know everything possible was done to try to save his life.

I wish you knew the unique smell of burning insulation, the taste of soot-filled mucus, the feeling of intense heat through your turnout gear, the sound of flames crackling, the eeriness of being able to see absolutely nothing in dense smoke-sensations that I've become too familiar with.

I wish you could understand how it feels to go to work in the morning after having spent most of the night, hot and soaking wet at a multiple alarm fire.

I wish you could read my mind as I respond to a building fire "Is this a false alarm or a working fire? How is the building constructed? What hazards await me? Is anyone trapped?" Or to an EMS call, "What is wrong with the patient? Is it minor or life-threatening? Is the caller really in distress or is he waiting for us with a 2x4 or a gun?"

I wish you could be in the emergency room as a doctor pronounces dead the beautiful five-year old girl that I have been trying to save during the past 25 minutes. Who will never go on her first date or say the words, "I love you Mommy" again.

I wish you could know the frustration I feel in the cab of the engine or my personal vehicle, the driver with his foot pressing down hard on the pedal, my arm tugging again and again at the air horn chain, as you fail to yield the right-of-way at an intersection or in traffic. When you need us however, your first comment upon our arrival will be, "It took you forever to get here!"

I wish you could know my thoughts as I help extricate a girl of teenage years from the remains of her automobile. "What if this was my sister, my girlfriend or a friend? What were her parents reaction going to be when they opened the door to find a police officer with hat in hand?"

I wish you could know how it feels to walk in the back door and greet my parents and family, not having the heart to tell them that I nearly did not come back from the last call.

I wish you could feel the hurt as people verbally, and sometimes physically, abuse us or belittle what I do, or as they express their attitudes of "It will never happen to me."

I wish you could realize the physical, emotional and mental drain or missed meals, lost sleep and forgone social activities, in addition to all the tragedy my eyes have seen.

I wish you could know the brotherhood and self-satisfaction of helping save a life or of preserving someone's property, or being able to be there in time of crisis, or creating order from total chaos.

I wish you could understand what it feels like to have a little boy tugging at your arm and asking, "Is Mommy okay?" Not even being able to look in his eyes without tears from your own and not knowing what to say. Or to have to hold back a long time friend who watches his buddy having rescue breathing done on him as they take him away in the ambulance. You know all along he did not have his seat belt on. A sensation that I have become too familiar with.

Unless you have lived with this kind of life, you will never truly understand or appreciate who I am, we are, or what our job really means to us...I wish you could though.
Author Unknown

I am married to the best man in the WHOLE world. There aren't many people who get to see the man that I see everyday. The man who is selfless, caring, loving, emotional, humbled. But there is one thing that I will never understand about him and that is his job. Everyday he goes to work he always is putting people before him- always taking care of there needs before his. I will never understand what he goes through on a daily basis but I will always pray that he returns to his family everyday.

Lots and lots of SMILES!

2007-09-19T22:52:00.001-04:00

So in the past week my baby boy has grown up so much... :( I am very excited and very sad at the same time... he just isn't supposed to grow up! Caidan has learned to SMILE! and let me tell you he does it all the time. Tonight as I was putting him into bed he burped and then smiled th BIG smile! It was so CUTE! He has also discovered he has a tongue which explains some of the pictures. He likes to be like a lizard and stick it in and out!

Videos of Caidan

2007-09-16T16:11:00.000-04:00

And everyone wonders...

2007-09-11T22:59:00.000-04:00

Seriously and people wonder why I want another one... LOOK AT HIM!!!! He just breaks my heart and I can only imagine what the next one will be like... but THANKFULLY my husband has the better brain because I probably would have ten by now (you know if it was possible.)

You know some days I want to scream along with him when he is fighting sleeping for the fourth time that day but over all I just wish is was possible to love him more... and I already love him a whole LOT!!! The best time for me is at bed time... we do our bedtime routine... bath, get dressed, eat and then song time... I hold him in my arms and he looks at me and I look at him and if you are a mom than you know this feeling. Every night I sing one song, pray for him and sing another song and I don't think there is one night when I don't cry. I can't even put in words how much he means to me. I am crying just writing this... Chris and him are my world and with out them I don't know what I would be doing... I LOVE THEM SO SO MUCH!!!!!

NO WAY!

2007-09-07T15:56:00.000-04:00

I couldn't believe how big my baby was until the other day at the doctors office... this little boy (who was one week old) was so tiny compared to Caidan. And it made me realize my son has a BIG head! And it also made me realize how fast they grow up... WAY TOO FAST! I want him to stay little forever and I tell him that. I tell him he is allow to talk and walk and sit... but he just can't grow! :) I think its time to start trying for another one... :-D

Lazy mornings

2007-08-24T17:39:00.000-04:00

There is one thing I LOVE about my mommy so so much she always brings me in bed with her in the morning- and when the nights daddy is gone I get to sleep with mommy.

I love when mommy comes and gets me in the mornings from my bed and we go and lay down in her bed and she just cuddles me and kisses me and just loves me! Its so great! Everyone needs to have my mommy.

I AM SO CUTE!!!

2007-08-22T20:16:00.000-04:00

So my mommy and daddy (well mainly my mommy) tells me all the time that "You are so CUTE!" I am not sure what that means exactly but everyone is always ewwwing and awwing over me. I really don't mind though because they always hold me and feed me and spoil me but I am sure that I am not supposed to know what that means either. But little do they know I have them wrapped tightly around my finger well atleast my mommy. I think I really like her (my mommy that is) maybe I even love her- am I supposed to love her? I am supposed to love her because she is my mommy and little boys are supposed to love there mommies right?? Why isn't there some kind of book you know like "Dummies for Babbies- The Things You Should Do and Know" Oh well I am just glad that my mommy is who she is and don't even get me started about my daddy. Mommy thinks my daddy is tuff on me sometimes but I just think my daddy loves me a whole bunch. Mommy says daddy works with Fire trucks but I don't know what that is. I guess I will learn.
Well thats all from my world. I don't do much- you know eat, sleep, poop. Maybe not in that order but eventually I do all that. Just saying HI to this big big world out there that I am not sure I know how BIG it really is.

I'm ONE month old!

2007-08-20T12:15:00.001-04:00

Caidan is one month and I can't even believe it. He had is one month check up last wednesday and he weighed 9lbs and he has grown 3/4 an inch. He is in his 25% for hieght and weight. He just isn't going to be a big boy. He changes more and more each day and he gets bigger every day... they should stay little forever!

Well we had trouble breastfeeding from the beginning and I was pumping and givng it to him in a bottle but it got very stressful on me and my milk started to dry out. As much as I wanted him to be breastfed he is now on formula and I have to admit that I am a lot happier.

Caidan loves to take a bath until you start washing him and then its all down hill from there.

Three weeks

2007-08-07T16:02:00.000-04:00

Well my little man is almost three weeks old and I can hardly believe it. It feels so much longer than three weeks.

My mom was here last week with me and my whole family now has seen him. Of course they all love him... (I don't know how anybody couldn't). He is doing great and so I am. I am gradually getting back to doing things that I haven't done in a very long time and it feels great.

Bitty decided that she liked the pacifier more than Caidan (Caidan doesn't like it so don't worry we didn't give it back to him!)

Only a few days

2007-07-24T13:32:00.000-04:00

Only a few days old and he has changed so much!!!

Caidan is a very easy baby (THANK YOU GOD!) He sleeps great at night wakes up once in the middle of the night and is all in all very content. I am so lucky that he got sleeping from his Daddy. The only wrong is that NONE of his clothes fit him yet... I thought that 7lbs was a decent size but he is just very tiny and I wasn't really expecting him to come so early and be so little.

But WE LOVE HIM and we are for sure keeping him.

Here are some pictures of our little Caidan Baidan...

Caidan sleeps likes this all the time when someone is holding him... if is was okay to put him on his belly at night I would because he would sleep forever. But I have figured out that while I was pregnant this is how he laid in me all the time... he very rarely puts his hands down while he is sleeping.

FINALLY!!!

2007-07-22T17:54:00.000-04:00

Well after being in the hospital for a week I (along with Chris and Caidan) are finally home. It has been a long journey and we continue to find that its not quit over yet (at least for me).

Last Sunday my mother-in-law and sister took me to the hospital because I had high blood pressure. They thought that they would keep me over night and watch my vitals hoping they would go down. Well they didn't and decided to induce me. I WAS SO EXCITED but little did I know what was to follow. They had officially diagnosed me with preeclamsia. Preeclampsia is a very unexplainable disease and can be very dangerous for mother and the only cure for it is delivery. Well after being in labor (actual labor) for 38 hours and only dilating to 4 maybe a 5 and my cervix had become swollen (meaning there really wasn't a way he was coming out vaginally) we decided to do a C-section. Caidan as everyone knows was already was born July 18th, 2007 at 7:05pm and weighed 7lbs 4oz. He was and still is a very healthy baby boy.

A normal stay in the hospital for a C-section is typically three days but mine turned into more like five because I have not fully come over preeclampsia. I still have high blood pressure and a whole lot of swelling going on. Yesterday (Saturday) we found out I at fluid on my chest and was given two rounds of water pills to help get some of the fluid off. After everything that I have been through I actually feel GREAT. I am tired a lot pretty normal for being a mom actually. And I still have to take it easy for a while one because I just had surgery and two because I still have preeclampsia. But I am happy to be at home and hopefully it will all get better from here.

Thank you to everyone whose has kept my family and I in your prayers. It is much appreciated!!

So I thought I would let you view some more pictures.

Caidan has already learned how to hold his own bottle!

Now a Family of Three

2007-07-19T15:27:00.000-04:00

First off, just to let you know this is Betsy posting. Kalla will share all details when she is up to it.
CAIDAN ALEXANDER RONNING was delivered by c-section on Wednesday, July 18 at 7:05 pm.
He weighed 7 pounds, 4 ounces and measured 20 inches.
Kalla and Caidan are doing great and should be joining Chris at home on Saturday.

What a LONG week.

2007-07-13T13:13:00.001-04:00

This has been the longest week ever....

So Monday morning I went to the hospital after having contractions all night long. It turned out they didn't want me to contract, so they pumped me with fluids. In a day and a half I had 6 liters of fluid. And they thought one liter would stop my fluids... haha! (thats what I wanted to do in there face). Then after one wasn't working they decided to give me this shot (I don't remember the name) But I didn't like the side affects and it wasn't stopping my contractions it was actually making them worse so I said NO!! to the next two they wanted to give me. (it was a 3 step process... they would give me three shots every 15-20min). Then they had to inform me that because I was 35 weeks and 5 days that if i was to deliver my baby boy might have trouble breathing because apparently boys lungs mature slower than girls. And I still said no to the drug. I knew that if my child was going to come out it would be on his own that way and he would be a little healthy boy.

Then after checking me to see if I was dialated I wasn't (that was very sad). But I was 75% effaced (don't ask me what it is just go look it up! My blood work was all great except my Uric Acid (i don't know what that is either but I do know they were conserned!) So they kept me over night and recheck my labs in the morning.

They then sent me home on bedrest... where I reside at this moment. And need I say I AM STILL CONTRACTING!

But on a good note my baby is perfectly fine... I on the other hand am border line. They are considering me boarder line preeclampsia. So i have to check my blood pressure twice a day and stay off my big fat swollen feet.

So that is where I am...